LinkedIn and dating; much the same really!

The business world has changed so much in the last twenty years that it is nigh on impossible imaging returning to sitting in a library flicking through reference manuals or scrolling through microfiche to unearth the information that you were after. If you’re under 30 you’ll probably have to Google microfiche – now how old do I feel!

So, where would we be without LinkedIn, the new business white pages that seems to dominate these days? I bet you couldn't imagine going back to the days before you could find people you'd lost track of or attempt to connect with pretty much anyone in the working world, whether they like it or not. And therein, lies the rub.

In many ways, LinkedIn is a lot like a dating site, except for business.

If you’re old enough you’ll remember the J. Geils Band who had a song called "Love Stinks" that goes like this, "You love her; but she loves him. And he loves somebody else; you just can't win." Trying to connect with people on LinkedIn can be just like that. Moreover, how we network and form relationships in the working world is very similar to how we do it in our personal lives.

It is an almost unquestionable fact that these days if you want to have a career, you've got to have a LinkedIn profile. On top of that it's also a great way to manage your business contacts. But LinkedIn also makes it easy to try to connect with people you don't know to further your career or your business opportunities. However, don’t be surprised that it’s not just beautiful blondes who hit on your LinkedIn profile but the occasional moose too.

OK, not the world’s best analogy, but you've got to admit, it true. I’d be surprised if you haven’t had an opportunist or two contact you on a number of occasions. They put you on the spot and then you've got to reject them. It's annoying. Unless, of course, they've got something you want, in which case you’ve just made a connection. Not for life. Just until you get what you want, get bored and dump them. Just like dating.

As for posting to all those groups and commenting on discussions, that's just like when you were single, wasting your nights bouncing from one bar to another hoping to meet that someone special. Just try to imagine all those desperate, inane, rambling nightclub conversations that ultimately led to absolutely nothing. That's right. LinkedIn is just like that.

Twitter's different. Twitter's a media outlet, an overloaded news source for people with ADD - because very few people really ever have the time to read even a tiny fraction of what is tweeted. Anyway, you're not going to form any real relationships on Twitter. Either personal or business.

I’m over thirty (and quite a bit) so yes this all makes me sound cynical and jaded, but really that's because there's nothing new here, at least not if you’ve been around the block a few times. Working at a company or doing business is all about relationships. Business relationships, personal relationships, they all work pretty much the same way. And online social networks are just a new way to find each other.

Is there anything that can be learned from this? Business life is a lot like personal life. Companies are a lot like homes. Bosses are like parents. Business partners are like spouses. Colleagues are like friends. And employees are like kids. Yes that sounds strange, but if you think about it, it might actually make sense.

As for online social networks, they're just a new way to do the same old stuff. They're another way to find and connect with each other. The same rules apply.

As ever we’re keen to hear from you, let us know your thoughts on networking, social networks and if you must – your dating experiences!!

You can contact us at: blog@chestertongray.com or tweet us at @chestertongray